why the fuck....

sooo... 

i totally went for one of my good friends boyfriends for like a week.. before my concious kicked in.. and i was like no. 

bad me..

on another note.. my parents have started talking to eachother.. not sure if this is good or not. they are finally pissed off at me. daddy says i need to gain some selfesteeem. caues i have none.. 

hum.. i wonder why....

he and mum think i am a good girl and i was brought up right and they couldnt ask for a better daughter.. however i am dissapointing them. wft

on the same note.. i am underhouse arreset basically by dad.. and mum.. dad is taking away the car i can only go to work and back.. and take care of the dogs.. gahh.. 

fucking hell....

dad say "i know you can do better. you are bullshitting us and yourself. and sadly you are believing yourself."

low low low selfesteem.

also... if a friend of mine comes onto dads property dad will not hesitate to call the cops.. gahhh.. 

on the same note as cops. if i dont pay my ticket. mum and dad both agree that i will spend the night in jail.. or untill i pay it. caues they aren't bailing me out.

this day just started off bad. i couldnt wake up. i had to take the dogs out for a walk caues i wasnt gonna be able to get them till later tonight. 

then michael called and said he was waiting at the cingualr store caues he wanted the new iphone. so i went and waited with him for a bit. caues i didnt have work till 11 and i had walked the dogs.  

mum left for jersey. 

she'll be back on sunday.. next sunday. 

so i get to work and almost break down. i couldnt even talk to coustomers. it was bad. 

i asked if i could go early and kevin said he would see. tj comes in a realizes somethings wrong right away. 

my shell is breaking. i need to stay away from michael he makes me feel too much. the shell is breaking not good. shit fuck. this is like the 4th or 5th time i have almost broken down. fuck fuck fuck...

on an up note i saw joe today. it made me feel alot better to see him. he put a smile on my face and he paied for lunch. i didnt ask him to. he saw that it was only 20.18 and he said he got it. yea~!~

lets see.. dad decided to drop everything on me right before work and it threw me off the whole day. i came home early from bbw becaues of it. crystal and erin and everyone else noticed.. tomica looked at me and was like smile. crystal was like sometings wrong ur not uppity.. that almost brought a smile to my face.  raffette came in and took over my shift for me thank god. 

well im gonna watch yuyu now.. so ttyl... leave one.. pitty or tell me im a re.